It's all over

My grandfather calls me a schoolteacher. I think it's a generational (or maybe regional?) thing, and it used to annoy me a little. I can't really explain why. Maybe because when I hear the word "schoolteacher" I flash to images of Laura Ingalls Wilder teaching on the prairie after finishing 8th grade. Which is, in no way, an insult to the late Mrs. Wilder. She happens to be one of my heros, but I digress. I guess the title bothered me because I felt it was a cutesy designation for what I feel should be a professional occupation. That's part of the problem with the profession--we get no respect!

Today, I'm rather glad that people have called me a schoolteacher, because it gives me a clear delineation for my life. I'll always be a teacher, whether I'm teaching university students or the children I have yet to birth (or incubate, come to think of it). But it's not looking like I'll ever be a schoolteacher again. We finished summer school today, and it was my last day of employment with the district. It's a sweetly sad feeling, saying goodbye to these four years as a public schoolteacher. The best way I can describe it is like if you had a distinct moment in time when you knew you were saying goodbye to your childhood--to clover chains and dress-up trunks and long summer afternoons running through the sprinkler. We don't often get to mourn the end of an era as it happens--most often we don't even realize it's over until much later. Today, I was blessed to have the opportunity to take a moment and say goodbye to four crazy-but-good years and a facet of myself. It's a good thing.

I'm getting incredibly excited. I received a letter last week from the university informing me that I've been awarded a fellowship I didn't even apply for, so that's good news. The summers that I was told were not funded now are! Hurray! Also, this upcoming year will be my only year as an instructor. After this, I'll be assigned duties as a research assistant. The letter mentioned that this would possibly bring opportunities to co-author papers with professors. As much as I love to teach, it's time to accept that I'm entering the world of academia and it's publish or perish from now on. There will still be some teaching each semester, but I think I'm good with this. I was very surprised to receive the letter, as I was unaware such a fellowship even existed, but it was a very, very happy surprise. I'm still a bit curious about what this will mean in regards to nitty gritty of day-to-day life.

Details are beginning to come together, and suddenly the vague wisp of an idea I had back in October is actually becoming reality. I have a pile of reading stacked on my desk, which is probably a preview of coming attractions for the next five years. I also need to somehow compose a course description for a composition class, which is more intimidating than it sounds, especially when I made the mistake of checking all the other instructors' descriptions. I'm actually leaning toward the slightly ironic, very modern description as follows: "In this course, you will become a better writer." Thoughts, anyone? Am I showing everyone that I'm an academic fraud and I don't belong if I go with that one? Or am I being an individual whose students can expect a simple, concise teaching style?